Legal Questions? / Legal Answers!
Getting Visitation & Parental Rights
Without The Control Issues.
Here Is Where Everything Starts!
"So you had children with someone who
now has "physical" custody of them.
If your going through a Divorce, chances
are you have an Attorney who is handling
things for you. As with any Divorce, if there
are children involved, Child Custody issues
are usually at the top of the list. But lets
not forget personal property, disbursement
of all debts, and real estate property. If
your Divorce is complicated, having that
Attorney is what is best!"
But if you have children, and you were NEVER
married to the "other" parent.
If there are no real estate issues, no personal
property to dispute. If all you need is help
with visitation and perhaps, help in understanding
what your rights are in reference to your
child(ren).
I may be able to help.
This section was written for the "other"
parent. The one who really wants to be in
their child's life but that control issue
is always in place. They put up with if for
years upon years. Why? Some parents I have
discussed this with tell me they just can't
afford it. ( Total Cost: Approx: $213.00
) Others I have talked with say they don't
change anything because, they have no idea
what to do, or how to go about doing it.
Lets Explore Some Common Myths Related To
The Separation Of The "Other" Parent
And Their Child(ren).
Some believe and are even told, that if your
unemployed you have no right to see your
child(ren).
Some believe and are even told, that if you
don't pay child support, have no right to
see your child(ren).
Some believe they will never be able to afford
an Attorney to help them.
Some believe that because the Mother gave
birth, she gets custody automatically.
Perhaps you think the "other" parent
has all the rights to tell you when you can
see your child(ren) ....or even if you can!
Perhaps the "other" parent who
has the child(ren), has already gone to D.H.H.S.
and started collecting State Benefits.
Perhaps the "other" parent already
has a Child Support order against you, provided
by D.H.H.S.
Perhaps you think : "There is nothing
that can be done about it now."
That is so NOT true!
Keep this statement in mind. You May Not Think You Have The "Legal
Right" To See Your Kids, But They Have
A Right To See You!
If you were never married, the Parental Rights
and Responsibility paperwork I will show
you how to fill out and file, will spell
out all your visitations and a lot more!
You do NOT have to be employed or currently
paying child support to file this form! People
lose their jobs, it happens. I am pretty
sure the extra stress you may get from the
"control" over your children, is
not going to help either you or them. Not
being able to pay child support is also not
a legal excuse to keep your children from
seeing you.
"Some words of caution on that above
statement. If you haven't paid any child
support at all or have been on and off with
your payments, the Judge / Mediator may want
some assurances that current child support
and past child support will be paid. The
issue of helping to support your child is
as important as your Parental Rights. If
your not currently paying support, be sure
you have a plan to do so, ready. If your
wages are currently being garnished by the
State, your paying your child support. Paying
your child support makes this process move
along quicker. Go get your Parental Rights."
So, why bother with filing this Parental
Rights Order if things between you and the
other parent are fine? Well, for a lot of
reasons really. Are things fine because your
currently paying your child support? Is that
because D.H.H.S. garnished your wages? What
would happen if you lost your job? How about
if you don't agree with a decision the other
parent makes? What if the other parent is
going to move out of state and figures you
don't have any say in the matter? What if........?
After you have filed this order and it is
in effect, all of the above "myths"
will not matter. This order cannot be changed
without a Judge's Order to change it. Failure
to follow the Parental Rights Agreement could
result in a contempt of court charge against
the offending parent. Filing this order really
protects you "down the road," from
the uncertainty of what life may throw at
you. So, if someday you find it difficult
to pay your child support. Maybe because
of loss of employment or injury, that does
not change anything about your Parental Rights
Agreement. Your visitation schedule and all
Parental Rights, are still maintained and
enforceable until a Judge, not the other
parent, says differently.
BTW - "If your lucky enough to have the other
parent's approval of your Parental Rights,
this paperwork can be filed for less money
and less court involvement! You will still
need to fill out all the paperwork listed
below and one more, if this agreement is
uncontested. I'll show you how to do so at
the end of this page."
There are only a few subjects here to deal
with:
1. Filing the Parental Rights and Responsibilities
paperwork with the court.
2. Serving The Other Parent With The Paperwork
3. Going through the Mediation Process.
4. Dealing with D.H.H.S. as far as the Child
Support issue.
5. If Needed, going through the Guardian Ad Litem process.
This Is Probably The Most Important Statement
I Can Make.
"If you were never married, but both
parents names are on the child's Birth Certificate,
neither one has "legal" custody
of the child(ren). The person who has the
child(ren), only has "physical"
custody of the child(ren). Now don't be stupid and figure this gives
you the right as a parent, to keep your child
after a visit, or disrupt your child's life
with school, or friends. It doesn't! In fact, if you ever intrude on your child's
lifestyle, most every Judge would take that
as a sign that you don't really have your
child's best interest in mind and you could
be charged with Criminal Restraint. Listen
up here! I was the example for that last
statement thirty six years ago. I know this
charge can be brought against you if you
keep your child from the other parent. What
did I learn as I sat in jail for 3 days,
charged with Criminal Restraint? To do things
legally and use the legal system to help
you get what you want."
I would be willing to bet that if you were
never married, nobody has filed for parental
rights of the child(ren). The "other"
parent may have "physical custody"
of your child(ren). Giving them the right
to collect benefits from D.H.H.S.
If you want to file this Order, and receive
your visitations, but feel you will need
some help, the V.L.P. and Pinetree Legal
Services my be able to help you. See: Ideas, Advice PTL & VLP.
"By the way, most parents seem so concerned
with their rights to visitation with their
children, that the fail to also see what
else may be included in your Filing of the
Parental Rights & Responsibility Order.
The issues of School Records, Health and
Doctor Information, Relocation of the other
parent and yes, even claiming them for income
tax purposes, can also be decided."
I do need to stress something here. If your
a convicted sex offender. If you are currently
under a Protection From Abuse Order that
also includes an / O.B.O. (on behalf of:
the child(ren's name(s). If your past criminal
record includes any instances of endangerment
to a child, this website may not be much
help to you.
Note: If The Protection From Abuse Order against
you does NOT include your children, you may
still be able to file this paperwork. You'll
just have to make arrangements to pick up
and drop off your children, in a location
that doesn't include having contact with
the other parent. That will have to be agreed
on by the Judge. See: Filing A PFA .
If you have no past criminal charges that
the other parent could use against you. And
I mean think about it. People make mistakes.
If your past situation doesn't involve hurting
a child, or ever endangering a child, in
any manner, I would still suggest that you
try to get your Parental Rights. ( "For those of you who have had legal
problems in the past, who are not sure if
those problems would be an issue in your
visitation schedule, remember, there are
always supervised visits that may be able
to be ordered." )
So Lets Get Started! - Instructions
"I have never assumed I have a right
to see my children.... I have always believed
that they have the right to see me!"
My Final Thought...
"I have included the instructions on how to
fill out the necessary paperwork to receive
visitations, school records, doctor records,
holiday visits, vacations and tax claims.
I am very proud of this document and happy
it has helped so many people since I first
uploaded it. Judge's like the fact that the
two parents work together and include each
other in their children's future. Remember,
once this document is filed with the court,
a Motion to Modify document would need to
be filed in order to change anything agreed
on."
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